My Birthday Roast.

For my 29th Birthday this year, my friends threw me a roast. I got roasted. Then I got toasted. Ever have one of those nights where the pictures tell the story? Well, here are the pictures...Some of them anyway. I don't know how I managed to have 2 bottles of wine in 2 hours by myself, but I did. I was more then 'Sideways'. It was a great night. So I was told... Shelley Wade hosted the event. She's an amazing friend and party planner. I felt like a Puerto Rican Princess! And I'm not even Puerto Rican...Amazing. Becky Donohue was the Master of Ceremonies. I do remember the beginning. She was hilarious. She said, and I quote - "Lesbians have better taste in men the Michelle for gawd sakes!" Classic. Uncle Dick performed a few songs. They're great if you haven't seen them. I don't know how they've managed to have 5 or 6 songs about anal sex. But they do it. And they do it well. The singing that is... One of my oldest friends, Jennifer Wellman, had much to say about me. Even though she's not a comic, she's still funny. J Wellman - "I know I'm not a comic, and this may not be funny, but I've been to alot of comedy shows and have seen you guys, and either are some of you..." I love it! Rasheem Nurse is also one of my closest friends. "Her family feed me one time, and I just kept goin' back...they don't even know my name, they just call me the black guy." I wish that wasn't true! Comic Elon James White TRIED to roast me, but I don't remember him having any jokes. Just sweating alot... buah! Carolyn Vink, a New York City comic, let me know who said it first ...Wanda Sykes apparently. So? I'm trying to write notes in retaliation. Only would've worked sober. Or even tipsy. Comic Josh Filipowski had his girlfriend Megan draw a chicken wing on his face! A dream come true. It's the little things. Comic Baron Vaughn said I looked like the fat Lil' Kim. That's original. Eric Andre said I look like a broke Lisa Bonet. Then got me a shot if tequila. Then I threw up. Thanks Eric. Comedy Village comic & booker PJ Landers as Michelle Buteau in drag. So scary how good he looks with brown tits and in those jeans. He's fucking hysterical. Comic Al De Bene took time off from watching Dane Cook to come down and roast me..I love you Al! "How do you take a shitty comedy club and make it shittier?" Oh gawd. The beginning of the end. I'm trying to roast people back...with wine and a slice of pizza in hand... Oh yeah, and this is the part of the evening where Becky gives up trying to get the mic back, and I get all Oprah and shit. Me: "No matter how old you are...follow your dreams!!" Audience: "Shut up drunk bitch! Where's the cake?" This cake look fabulous. I had no idea I had cake till I saw the pics! Whatta shame. And it looks good on too! Aight, party's over. Time to carry the drunk bitch to the car, then call her for the next 2 weeks to recap the party over and over and over and over again. Thank you. Photos were taken by Brian Van Nieuwenhoven. Check his website out @ www.485i.com He takes amazing pics and will even hook up a website for you. The above pics are a recap of the roast, for more, check out the link below. http://http://www.flickr.com/photos/brianvan/sets/72157594209699521/

Lucky.

I complain alot. I should remind myself how lucky I am. How easy I have it. This is a reminder to myself. It's not so fucking bad.

Juan Bago Jr. - Mi casa es su casa.

Last year I filmed a movie in Washington Heights, (Dominican Harlem) called Juan Bago. It was an off the hook good time. I'm Haitian, but the minute I got on set, (which was complete with Bachata music, Reggaeton, good eats, and "Yo Momma's so Puerto Rican" snaps) I knew I was at home away from home. The crew: "Bitch! Haitian? You Dominican!" Me:"Um, okay." www.nylatinofilm.com The movie premiered Friday, July 28th, in the New York Latino Film Festival! Was an amazing time -- big shout outs to Michael Diaz, (the star, writer, producer, and mayor of The Heights)and everyone I met and worked with on the film. They're a amazing & talented. I play Natalie, an annoying co-worker. I know, you're thinking, "Michelle? Annoying?" It was a stretch. "Hey Juuuuuaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnn!!!!!!!!!!!" The Island of Hispanola isn't too big. "You complete me!"